Midnight Snack
by purduepup
Summary: AU, InuKag, Citrus, Written with anime-patriot! Kagome's new to her apartment, replacing a woman who could pass for her twin. Her new neighbor is a sleepwalker—and used to visiting her condo at night? But with his sexy body, it's hard to resist a taste…
1. Only a Grape

**Disclaimer:** We do not own Inuyasha, but thank you for the depressing reminder. *PP sobs*

**PP'S A/N:** I've had this idea for a while, and could see the humor in it; however, I'm not much of a good citrus writer as of the moment. -.-' Luckily, I have an amazing friend—anime-patriot—whose specialty is writing citrus (so check her out, you hear? *stern face*). We collaborated, me writing most of the humor and interaction whereas she wrote the sexual scenes and handing out suggestions, and _voila_: this story was born! :O (Would that make us a couple, I wonder, being parents of the same fanfic? o.O) Well, anyway, I hope you enjoy our humorous, sexy short story, _Midnight Snack_, and won't hesitate to review! ^.^

**AP'S A/N: **Lol well I'm glad to help. ^_^ This story was fun writing. Idk what else to say really. I guess we are really technically parents of this and hopefully more to come~ Guess my smut writing skills are coming to good use. ^_^ Purduepup is an awesome friend too, this whole thing was her idea, as she stated. (I wonder how many people are actually going to read these AN's. O.O;; ) PP is better at writing long chapters than I am. ^_^ So let's give her a round of applause *claps*

PP: I'm flattered, I really am. *blushes*  
INUYASHA: Feh, you should be arrested.  
PP: SHUT THE F**K UP! *killer eyes, throws knives*  
INUYASHA: *whimpers before running away*  
PP: *chases with an electric collar in hand*  
SESSHOUMARU: *videotapes* This is going on YouTube. *evil grin*  
AP: …*Writes down fanfic involving shock collar* JK JK lol.  
PP: She would totally do it—and make it sexual all the way. I know she would. -.-'

**FOREWARN: Inuyasha is human. If you say otherwise… Well, we have a little black book and pen just **_**screaming**_** for us to write your name. That's all you need to know. -.-**

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**Midnight Snack**

a patriot-pup production

_1: Only a Grape_

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To say she was exhausted would be an understatement.

Heaving again, Kagome laid her head against the top of her television, wondering why she didn't call some movers to take care of her heavy furniture for her. She was becoming sweaty in the summer heart, and as her breathing progressively turned scarce, she watched as her friend Sango struggled with her box of plates and glasses before tripping and sending the whole package flying into a nearby truck. The sound of breaking porcelain met her ears, and Kagome mourned her loss by banging her head against the TV, not caring what damage it did to the object, her heart-shaped face, _or _her remaining brain cells.

She was so, so _tired_.

After her roommate Ayumi told her she was pregnant and her boyfriend Hojo would be moving in to care for the baby, Kagome was, for lack of a better term, kicked out of the nice one-story cottage and sent to the city to live in what she presumed to be a slum. Luckily, though, with help from her old college friend Sango, not only did she find a decent apartment, but said friend was also an athletic assistant capable of moving Kagome's belongings to the condo on the seventh floor. After settling the moving issue with her boss at the library near the outer edge of the city and convincing the old man Totosai to let her keep her job there (which wasn't that hard, considering the old man forgot her name when she arrived), they'd pulled in the apartment complex's parking lot, put on some thick gloves, and automatically went to work.

Needless to say, things weren't going as well as she hoped.

Groaning, she grunted as she hoisted the inherited television up onto her arms, ignoring the trembling of her elbows as she approached the door again, only to set down the contraption when her arms gave up on her persistence. Working as a librarian didn't seem to help her arm muscles any, and judging by Sango's magenta orbs practically crying over being tired, even a yoga trainer couldn't handle this kind of physical torture. She mentally measured the distance between the stairs where she lay and the door ahead, and huffed.

Twenty yards. She could _do _this…!

With newfound determination, Kagome picked up the TV again and passed by Sango, who was jadedly carrying the box with her silverware again, though this time, the broken pieces made wonderful music for their journey to heaven. The moment Kagome reached the door, she nearly howled with relief.

That is, until she realized she needed to use a key to get in.

_God _dammit…_!_

"You look pissed," Sango noted in a pant as one of Kagome's azure eyes twitched and the television met the ground.

To say she was pissed was also an understatement.

**^—^—^—^—^**

Fortunately for her, Kagome's apartment was cozy just like the ad said, and fortunately for her muscles, it was cleared of the previous owner's things and now covered in only a very thin layer of dust. It had been a week since the lady had passed away, according to the Shikon Condos owner Midoriko, and she had some of the male inhabitants move the deceased's things out. As Kagome set down her broken television and Sango dropped her doomed tableware, the book lover took in her new home in awe despite the aching of her limbs.

Due to her small salary, this place would be her home for quite a while, and as she viewed the sunlight streaming in through the windows and reflecting off the hardwood floor, Kagome briefly smiled at the thought of having a place to herself.

"So, Kagome-chan," Sango began, her lungs finally returning to her though her chestnut ponytail remained mussed, "have you bought any food yet?"

And there went her smile.

With a newfound frown and furrow of the eyebrows, Kagome realized no, she didn't have any food. This would probably screw her over later tonight when she woke up for her nightly snack, but she'd spotted a ramen store across the street that had an _Open 24/7!_ sign up; she wouldn't go hungry, that was for sure. Shrugging at the insinuation, Kagome plopped down on the floor and crossed her legs, taking in the mediocre living space and its bland walls. Whoever lived here before her must've not been much of an interesting person, and even though Kagome was a librarian, she did not hold one's expected dullness. She made a mental note to buy some paint later on, and when Sango collapsed beside her, moaning as if suddenly realizing something tragic, Kagome underwent the same realization:

They still had to move the _actual _furniture up the stairs.

_SHIIIIIIIIIT…_

The friends nearly cried tears of blood once Kagome's recliner, party couch, love seat, dining table, matching chairs, stools, mattress, bedstead, fridge, and many other back-breaking, spine-snapping objects were safely inside Kagome's apartment—this time Sango and Kagome having begged the apartment bellhop-boy-thing Nobunaga to _please_ allow them to use the handicap elevator in order to prevent any future health complications. The librarian offered the yoga trainer a bottle of water, and together, they both choked by chugging the liquid too quickly. Tossing her bottle away in her trash can (one of the items she didn't mind carrying up the numerous flights of stairs), Kagome eyed the heavy furniture once more, imagining what it'd be like to move it around her entire apartment…

…

"So, Sango, wanna go meet my new neighbors?"

Grabbing Kagome's earlier made cookies in a large cooking pot, their eagerness to procrastinate didn't escape the gods' attention as they scurried out the apartment door and to the nearest one: the one across from Kagome's new residence. Sango knocked on the door for her wary friend, and Kagome avoided the stress even carrying a pot full of cookies had on her arms as she smiled bright for the stranger she was going to meet. The door creaked open, black hair was revealed, then a charming smile that quickly turned to…surprise?

"Kagome? Sango?"

_"FUUUUUUUCK!"_ Sango screamed to the heavens, immediately storming away.

Kagome and her neighbor stared at her retreating form before slowly turning back to each other.

"Miroku?" Kagome asked, curiosity apparent as she took in the matured version of her old university peer. "What are you doing here in Tokyo? Last I heard, you went to the mountains to further study Buddhism."

Sango's once-upon-a-boy-toy grinned sheepishly, his handsome features showing under the dim fluorescent lighting. "After two months, it became evident my morals did not fit with those of the monks." Hearing the obvious reason behind it all, Kagome rolled her eyes. Miroku raised an eyebrow, indigo orbs shining mischievously as he questioned, "And what of you and Sango, Miss Kagome? Last _I _heard, you were living with Ayumi-chan on the countryside whereas my dearest Sango was further into the city."

Kagome flushed some, the color contrasting to her wavy raven locks. "Ayumi and Hojo are expecting a child soon, so I needed to move out to give their family more room."

Miroku hummed, nodding thoughtfully. "So, I'm supposing Sango will not be moving in with you?"

Kagome nearly choked when she realized what he was thinking. "Miroku," she began, "you could've gotten Koharu-san _pregnant_. And even though you're lucky it turned out to be that Naraku guy's, I don't think Sango-chan will be accepting of your affections anytime soon." Then, as if to prove a point, she waved to the empty space beside her, where a Sango-shaped void remained, deciding now was not exactly the right time to tell Miroku that Sango was dating some guy named Kuranosuke on the other side of town.

Seeming to be on the verge of tears, Miroku whined frantically, "But, _Kagome_…!"

"No buts," Kagome said sternly with an expression to match. Remembering why she came there in the first place, she held out the pot, offering a cookie and a _we'll catch up later_. Miroku pouted for a moment before realizing the pot's contents, face automatically lighting up as he grabbed a handful and closed the door on her face.

…So, it was _probably_ safe to say she was on her own now…

Groaning, Kagome readjusted her carrying case before moving onto the next door, one closer to the staircase. The hallways were wide enough to fit three people shoulder-to-shoulder, somewhat luckily for her, so she didn't have to travel too far to reach her next destination. She tapped on the door with her oversized pot, then teetered on her feet while gazing at the apartment's outer walls. It seemed the complex wasn't in an elegant state like her own condo, instead having chipped paint and water stains with second-rate lighting. She twisted her nose in distaste, deciding to talk to Midoriko later about its condition, when the door swung open to reveal a slightly plump woman who—

Oh, wait, technical difficulties: The woman was short, and Kagome couldn't really past the pot…

Turning slightly, Kagome realized not only was the woman petite and chubby, but had an eye patch surrounded by a wise and aged face, and the eye that _wasn't _covered was regarding her with such austerity and suspicion that it nearly made her wet her shorts. However, it seemed the lady realized her new stature at the complex because her gaze softened and she questioned kindly, "Do ye need assistance?"

Kagome, to say the least, was very tempted to throw the pot into the graying woman's arms and run away, but decided better of it. She shook her head, instead settling for "I'm Higurashi Kagome, and I just moved here from the outskirts. I thought I'd go around and offer cookies to my new neighbors is all."

"Kaede," the woman murmured, mostly disregarding Kagome's words as she took in the girl's shaking knees, limp wrists, and trembling elbows. She repeated, "Do ye need assistance, Kagome-san?"

_Oh, thank god,_ Kagome thought as she carelessly tossed the pot to Kaede and collapsed outside the doorway. She barely noticed the old woman falling over at the sudden weight or the questioning barks from the neighbor nearest to the stairs, wondering what the racket was all about. _Relief, _sweet_ relief, _she rejoiced as Kaede huffed and stood up again, this time the jar secure in her arms. The old lady said blankly, "If ye get off the floor, I'll help ye deliver these to the rest of our neighbors."

"Our" caught Kagome's attention, and she grinned when she realized the woman already thought of her as one of them. "Okay," she said, getting to her feet and dusting off invisible dirt. After closing the door after Kaede, Kagome followed her to the room where shouts had been resonating just a moment ago and gleefully knocked on the mahogany paneling.

What greeted her was life-changing.

There stood a god from Mount Olympus itself, adorned in no shirt and a pair of boxers and reeking of pure, untamed masculinity. Thick locks of obsidian reached his heart in a low ponytail, sticking to his slightly sweaty, glistening tanned skin, and Kagome felt a rush of heat sweep through her body—most specifically, the lower half—the moment his heated, seductive amethyst gaze crossed her figure, looking dark and enticing under feral ebony bangs. His attire didn't help her arousal, either, as she noticed the sharp, hard planes of his bare chest, darkened nipples, broadness of his shoulders, tightness of his calves and thighs, and strong, defined arms with large, calloused, and powerful hands to match…

Kagome nearly bit off her bottom lip trying to keep in her drool.

Dear _god_, save her and her lusty desires now_…!_

"What'd you want, ya old hag?" he barked at Kaede, who remained obscured by the large cookie pot. Meanwhile, the newcomer to their complex watched the way his delectable, succulent lips moved, revealing two slightly pointed canine teeth and making her wonder how those lips would work on her own two pairs…

Kagome shifted uncomfortably.

As if finally noticing her (which was untrue, mind you; she was absolutely sure he was staring at her a moment ago!), the god turned to her, eyes flashing with annoyance and some hurt emotion as he snapped, "And who the hell is this wench?"

_Twitch_.

Did he…really just call her '_wench_'?

As Kagome suffered a mental breakdown over such an orgasmic, holy being looking down on her, Kaede's eyebrows furrowed as she addressed the man. "Be nice to ye new neighbor, Inuyasha."

Dear god, this was getting unbelievable. _'Inuyasha'_. Even his _name _oozed sex…

Swiftly reverting back to the drooling stage, Kagome nearly blanked out while the two continued conversing. "Keh, like I care," Inuyasha snapped, canine poking that delicious-looking bottom lip… "I got enough shit to take care of with packing up and moving out."

Kagome nearly choked.

_Moving… Moving _OUT_?_

No "no" was longer than her mental "NOOOOOOOOO—" at that moment.

Kaede rolled her eyes, still oblivious to Kagome's inner turmoil. "The reason why ye wish to move out eludes me," she muttered, eyeing the exercise machines in the background and raising a questioning brow. "And why would ye equipment be out if ye were busy packing, Inuyasha?"

"Feh!" he huffed, turning his nose up at her. Casually, his eyes traveled to where a slightly drooling, slightly stressed Kagome stood, resisting the urge to tackle him or twitch. His dark eyebrows swung low in a frown as he demanded, "And just who the fuck are you again, wench?"

Snapping back into reality after _that _rude awakening, she said levelly—rather forced, actually—"I'm Higurashi Kagome and new to this complex. I wanted to meet all my neighbors and give them cook—"

Without a word, he grabbed the entire pot from an unsuspecting Kaede and slammed the door on both of their shocked and flabbergasted faces, not bothering to hear the rest of Kagome's monologue before her jaw dropped and hung while she stared at the once again closed mahogany door.

And thus, the twitching began.

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**PP'S A/N: **I listened _nonstop _to Breathe Carolina and Theory of a Deadman while writing this. Check them, and my amazing citrus co-writer and good buddy, anime-patriot, out! :D This should be at maximum five chapters (probably; I don't know), and updates will come at random, though this will most likely end before the new year (I repeat: Most likely. We really don't know). Hope you enjoyed this first chapter and will stick around for the next, where the citrus arrives~! ^.^

**AP'S A/N: **I…was writing a separate one-shot (which was inspired by Purduepup ^_^). And yeah I think _this_ story will be done by the New Year, if not within a week after that. ^_^ I'm hoping everyone sticks around for the next chapter.

PP: Really, stick around—or we'll kill you. T.T


	2. A Hint of Lime

**Disclaimer: **Again, with the ownage… *PP twirls hand in annoyance*

**PP'S A/N: **IT'S ALL MY FAULT! DX *cries because SHE'S the one to blame for this late update -.-,* While you're beating me with a stick, go check out anime-patriot's sexy fanfiction; she gives me nosebleeds daily with all her writing. *drools* If you're a fan of mine as well, you NEED to read her gynecologist-to-patient one-shot _Love Doctor _and fruit-orchard citrus collection _Fruit Basket_; both were inspired by yours truly. *grins like an idiot*

**AP'S A/N:** =.= I've been trying to keep a whip on her ass peeps, hopefully you haven't abandoned us and the next update will _hopefully_ come sooner than this one did. ^_^;;; And Love Doctor and Fruit Basket are only good because this woman proof-reads them =.=;;; But anyway **NO MORE DELAYS HERE IS MIDNIGHT SNACK CHAPTER 2! O:**

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**Midnight Snack**

a patriot-pup production

_2: A Hint of Lime_

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_The soft sound of keys jingling around came from the direction of the front door, stirring her awake from her usual half-slumbering condition. More confused than irritated (or even frightened), Kagome looked over to her bedroom door with a quizzical look, wondering who else could possibly have access to her apartment, and glanced at the alarm clock by her bed. _1:15 AM. _Who could even be coming _in_ at this time…?_

_Not even considering the noise to be a possible robber, serial killer, or mad rapist, she slowly rose out of bed and straightened out her cami-tee. She ventured out of her bedroom and tried to find her way through the apartment, her only light being the dim lighting from the moon that crept past her curtains. She didn't pay attention to the fact that she was only in the top and a pair of panties since it was hot and she didn't want to run air-conditioning all night or leave her window open. She was cautious and stood a good distance from the door when it opened— _

—_and it seemed the Levantine deity Adonis himself was hovering in the doorframe, halo, wings, and all._

…_Wait, did Adonis even have those? Oh, who gives a fuck._

_Kagome felt her eyes widen as he entered the room, coming into a clearer view, his sculpted muscles catching the small bit of light overhead while his amethyst eyes seemed to glow with lust as he grinned sexily, nearly making her orgasm right then and there. _What the hell is going on? Why is he in my room after how rude he was?_ Kagome's mind raced, and she felt her heart thudding as it began to beat faster: the closer he came, the faster it raced. She felt as if it could be seen through her chest, it was thumping so hard with adrenaline and wanton desire. Her eyes roamed down his chiseled chest to his perfectly toned abs, which separated with deep indents leaving her hungry to lick and taste the taut flesh. His body was perfect: perfectly toned, muscular, and tanned, strong in the way that she knew her sensitive nerves would be in good hands and proportioned enough to send wet visions flashing through the regions of her imagination. She knew she had to have been flushed in the face when her lower region started to ache from just the mere sight of this godlike man in her presence, flexing of its own accord and nearly making her whimper with need._

_While Kagome's eyes kept scanning him, she saw his "do-me lines", the lines that came together to form a _V_ protruding from his low-slung boxers. The sight of it made her blush harder, and it didn't help when he suddenly wrapped his strong arms around her body, pulling her close so her breasts were touching his chest, soft against his firm planes until she felt the added excitement of two pert peaks rubbing through her shirt to his bare torso—something he would undoubtedly notice, and would embarrass her to no end. While she inwardly cursed at herself for not keeping her arousal under control (_GAH! WHY'D YOU DO THAT? WHAT ARE YOU, SOME LAID-ONCE, HORNY— Oh, right_), she faintly noted how his violet gems darkened some shades upon noticing her body's stimulation before—_

…_Holy._

_FUCK._

LIP ON LIP CONTACT!

_**THANK YOU, KAMI!**_

_He _kissed_ her, his perfect, luscious lips moving against her still petals in an attempt to taste her flesh, and Kagome gasped in surprise and parted her lips when she felt one of his canines nip her lip, not asking for but _demanding _entrance. He had a smirk, a devilish, seducing grin that exposed his pearly whites as his tongue slyly made its way into Kagome's mouth, his expression smug when she moaned, melting into his embrace and letting him win the short battle of authority in this kissing game._

_More eager than she should've been—_What? He was HAWT!_—Kagome threw her arms around his neck and pressed against him more, letting another soft moan of burning satisfaction escape her lips. He ran his strong hands down her sides, slowly lifting her cami up from the hem, and she nearly shuddered from the feel of his skin against hers; his flesh contained electricity and coolness that bore relief to her own on the humid, muggy night, his hands smooth yet strong at once against her supple stature. They trailed up to her breasts, his masculine fingers and palms caressing her supple skin along the way and making butterflies ignite in her stomach while a spring began coiling elatedly in her core._

_His tongue twisted with hers as she ran her hands through his silky raven locks, each brush sending tingles through her arms, but soon after, Kagome broke the kiss off for a quick gasp of air, though she couldn't have cared less about breathing at that moment. She looked at the relaxed, seductive figure in front of her who was hot and cool at once, his mouth smirking without worry and eyes glinting with pure lust for _her_, and she suddenly felt a sort of weird resentment wash over her—they were still embracing, but something felt different. _

_No…this couldn't be a dream. It was too good to be a dream. It couldn't be a dream._

IT WAS A FUCKING DREAM.

_God _dammit_…!_

Scratching at her face, Kagome kicked away the suddenly confining, charcoal-colored bedcovers barely distinguishable in the stark moonlight coming from an adjacent window. They felt scratchy and blazing as her senses went off the meter, turning the comforting warmth in her room into an invisible fire burning her stomach out—in a good way. She warmed not only in her face, but a much lower area—the latter's suffering making her groan with complete agony and realization that she probably had no chance of relief. _Why? _she wanted to question the gods, _why must you be so cruel to me?_

Of course, she could've sworn she heard evil laughter echo and an insult she didn't quite catch, but she shrugged off the occurrence to be nothing due to her restless sleep.

She sighed tiredly, the newfound tightness in her bra distracting enough to suffocate her thoughts and force her to remove and toss it across the room. Feeling her hardened nipple's new sense of freedom didn't help her current sexual entrapment, though: recalling the way his hands had been all over her skin, his lips devouring her own as she drank in the sight and mere existence of him. Her night visions were already imprinted into her mind ("scarred" is more like it), and now her undecorated and impersonalized bedroom seemed a little too haunting for her liking as the scene just kept replaying…and replaying…

…and replaying…

…Shit.

She repeats: _God dammit…!_

How could she lust over a divine being who stole her cookies? She must've been awfully pathetic, kind of like what Ayumi insisted last month when Kagome watched reruns of _Guiding Light _while crying over an empty carton of pistachio ice cream and screaming curses at the characters. And now she felt not only pathetic, but awkward. After all, she never had a wet dream before…that didn't even involve the actual sex. Was it even normal to get wet from just making out from someone through a dream? What about real life? She'd kissed people before, had sex with an old boyfriend once, but…damn, none of that ever got her aroused before, not really to the point where her lingerie was so wet, she might as well have peed herself. How could one sensual dream with a violet-eyed Adonis score her some brownie points down below? While these insecurities tumbled through her, she eyed her bedroom's blank walls and eerie lighting with newfound paranoia, suddenly regretting not doing anything to the place to feel somewhat at peace, like it was her home and not some creepy, cum-stained hotel room.

She shuddered at that mental image.

As her azure eyes adjusted to the dimness of her apartment, Kagome glanced at the clock on the nightstand, and nearly let out an agonized groan. _12:03 AM_—she'd gone to bed a mere four hours ago after moving around some more furniture alone before coming across Sango in the hallway on her way to the front desk, the yoga trainer having paced the entire building as she moped and steamed about Miroku being Kagome's new neighbor. Her best friend apologized repeatedly, but Kagome outwardly assured her it was fine, Sango didn't miss much (besides meeting the godliest man the librarian had ever had the pleasure of knowing existed), and she could always come back to help her with the rest of the heavy objects. Sango took this all in stride, having confidence that Kagome had handled herself for the last two or so hours, before she left the complex to meet Kuranosuke at some club uptown.

The moment the door closed behind her, however, Kagome promptly collapsed on her new floorboards, missing the couch by a few inches and nearly breaking her nose.

Wincing at that memory—and feeling her face twinge in pain at the movement—she sighed before noticing a faint vacancy in her stomach that made her a bit queasy, which only meant one thing: her nightly ritual's fire signal. Initiating a glaring contest with her abdomen that she lost within the first few seconds, she let out an annoyed, monstrous sigh and forced her limp muscles into gear, pushing herself off the bed. After a face-plant to the floor and string of grumbling curses following the thunk, complaining about how her face just "needed_ that_ treatment", her legs unwillingly made their way from her bedside to the only foyer, passing by her bathroom and hall closet before finally reaching the kitchenette.

With gunk still in her eyes, Kagome dragged her legs to the fridge—the only thing left by the last owner including other kitchen appliances, since they were too bothersome for the "movers" to transport downstairs, even with the elevator. The walls were a very light gray with two carved in entryways, one to the hallway and another to her living room, and ventilation was nice in the room. And with the cabinets pine and countertops blue, it seemed like a modern, feminine kitchen, one Kagome thought was adorable, especially with its white and blue-accented tiles and her broken, inherited dishes and antique silverware lying carelessly in the sink.

But she didn't come to enjoy the view; she came to feed the baby Godzilla roaring in her stomach.

She opened the refrigerator door and was immediately blinded by the backlight, shining bright in her worn and tired eyes. Deciding it was the devil, she closed her eyes for adjustment, keeping them squinted for a moment before inspecting the fridge.

The _empty _fridge.

_By_ gods_…!_ If she didn't get food soon, Godzilla would come out and take care of all Tokyo!

Going into brief panic mode, too exhausted to exactly realize no Godzilla offspring was in her torso, Kagome grabbed a nearby coat for some decency considering her short, silk nightgown was nowhere near appropriate for the redheaded Shippou, his wife Satsuki, and their children on the first floor. Not to mention, the chance of her being molested or raped at this hour would decrease significantly if she seemingly had nothing to offer. She huffed, happy it was just warm outside for a summer's night, and snatched her key before stumbling through her apartment and out the doorway as if crazy Bieber fans were on the loose.

The moment she stepped outside, Kagome shivered in her trench coat; it was freezing in the hallway, the lights were dim, and both factors were creepy. Glaring at the vents that were supposed to warm her up, she came to the conclusion that central heating was only for _inside_ the apartments. Bristling a little at being halfway ripped off, she hugged her coat tighter around her body and squinted her eyes, still a little unfamiliar with the setup as she took in the wallpaper (or lack of thereof), ceilings (with flickering lights and all), and flooring (what the hell _happened_—?). Somewhat forgetting about her earlier panic now that she was just stunned once more over the condition of her new residence, the brunette began to make her way down the corridor, inwardly crying at her ever-growling stomach. _Shut up, I BEG OF YOU!_ she inwardly screamed, moving a hand over her abdomen. Dear Kami; the growl seemed so loud that it could probably cause a magnitude 9 earthquake to occur.

Wait…_Godzilla causes earthquakes._

She halted instantly in front of Miroku's door.

Before she could rush down the stairs upon having that "oh, shit" realization, Kagome heard a soft click come from down the hall. Wondering who else was up at this hour, she turned and saw the second most jaw-dropping sight: her godlike neighbor clad in only his boxers, even vacant of socks as his tanned skin glistened in the glow of the hall lights and his muscles flexed with each small movement he made. Inuyasha's body was shadowed by the muted illumination, but as he moved down the hallway seemingly towards her, the lights seemed to reflect off his drool-worthy figure and give him a holy glow. Upon getting a better view of his thighs and their accompanying partner Buttocks—who turned out to be very fit and curvy—the librarian wouldn't have been surprised if there was a puddle of saliva at her feet or blood pouring out of her nose.

He was moving slowly and there was a different look on his face than from before; gone was the fire and rude blaze, replaced with a dazed, almost peaceful expression. But the look in his eye, the way his hair draped around his face, his toned physique, and Kagome's own wandering thoughts about what was lying beneath the red boxers did not help her…aching. She licked her lips before biting the bottom petal harshly, her eyes still wide in shock at his appearance, especially after such a wet dream. Needless to say, hunger was now the farthest thing from her mind, much to her stomach's chagrin.

Then, of course, she went into schoolgirl freak-out mode.

_Is he really coming over to me? What could he possibly want? Oh, shit...is this other dream? No, no way—my face still hurts. Wait—does my breath smell? Do I look like crap because I just woke up? Dammit, I should've brushed my hair…!_ Her thoughts raced through her mind then stopped when Inuyasha did. He just stopped.

What. The. Fuck.

This god was only a few yards away from her and he just _stopped_. Kagome didn't know what to do, having an odd sense of déjà vu as she was reminded of another time he approached her—during her recent dream. But now, he paused, not scooped her into an embrace, and was just staring…not at her, but her door? But if he wanted her, why didn't he just come to her? There's no way he didn't see her, not when they were literally a foot away. She heard the same soft jingle of keys that was in her dream—then, all of a sudden, he was walking into _her_ apartment.

What. The. _Fuck_, x2!

Her dream wasn't supposed to be happening without her—

Wait, what?

Had he really just walked into her apartment? Fantasies aside, this was weird—even more weird than the time she walked in on Hojo and Ayumi conceiving their soon-to-be kid and she didn't leave immediately, thus after their climaxes, an awkward silence was shared until Hojo uncomfortably left the cottage to leave Ayumi and the librarian in an even more awkward silence until Kagome asked if they used protection (obviously not the case). Bafflement tugging at her nerves, Kagome furrowed her eyebrows and headed back to her apartment full-speed, following the godly man inside the complex.

"Can… Can I help you?" she inquired softly, finally having found her voice after the drool was wiped away. But much to her inner admirer's disappointment, instead of a yes or no as expected, Inuyasha gave her no answer whatsoever, perfectly content with just invading her living space. I mean, really? Hells, he didn't even turn around to _glare_ at her! What was she? Some darn fern in the corner of an art gallery, or a Spice Girls CD no one paid mind to while passing by?

SHE WOULD BE NO SPICE GIRLS CD.

Kagome had to confess, she hated this treatment more than the insults. At least he'd consulted her existence _twice _then and actually acknowledged her existence.

Now she was horny, confused, famished, and irritated. Come to think of it, she was starting to get pissed off, hot looks be damned! This jerk…sexy…fit…dreamy…_guh_ god,but jerk nonetheless, was mean to her earlier!

_And_ he stole her cookies!

That in itself was unforgivable.

"Hey, you know what, jerky-McJerk-jerk? You're really rude. And I think you owe me an apology," she said very unconvincingly—she never _was_ good at standing up for herself—before she placed her hands on her hips for extra effect, causing her coat to open and her nightgown to show. Not noticing her sudden exposure, she only narrowed her eyes at him and kept trying to push away her thoughts that were growing ever dirtier by the second.

To her utter disappointment, there was still no response from him. He just seemed to wander around her apartment, ignoring her with the same dazed look on his face, never acknowledging Kagome's existence as he nudged into a few things on his way to what looked to be the kitchen. It seemed as if he was following an invisible map—one that included bumping into strewn-about furniture—as he swayed his way through her apartment. "Hey! I'm talking to you!" she snapped, trying to gain control of the situation only to fail miserably, as usual. When he just kept continuing his journey, Kagome sighed in defeat, trying another approach: reasoning. "You know, since you're in my apartment, the _least_ you can do is acknowledge me."

It was then that Inuyasha stopped walking around and stood in her kitchen, staring off into space as he stood in front of the fridge. When he automatically opened it and peered inside, Kagome huffed and walked over to him, poking him gently in the chest, almost breaking her finger and inwardly making her whistle in impression while also silently crying over her poor appendage. God_damn_, his muscles were firm! If her jaw kept hitting the floor like it did, it wouldn't be long before it just fell off or her mouth ripped, and she would spend the rest of her life either looking like Kuchisake-onna or using sign language to communicate with others.

…Come to think of it, that'd be cool. She wouldn't mind, either, since talking in the library wasn't allowed anyway.

Getting back to reality, Kagome continually racked through her mind for good comebacks. "Ah— Hey, what are you doing in here, anyway?" she demanded, still trying to sound angry—and still failing miserably—though whatever irritation that managed to come through faded as soon as her eyes were glued to his chest and abs.

So glued to them, in fact, she didn't even see the hands approaching her own torso.

Her eyes practically popped out of their sockets in shock as she felt his strong hands over her breasts, cupping the braless mounds through the fabric of her nightgown and bringing back the situations she felt once upon a dream. A moan slipped out of her lips from the touch alone—the heat, electricity, and lust it brought sweeping throughout her really, _really _didn't help her situation, and the way his fingers traced over her stiff peaks didn't help her keep control of her breathing, heartbeat, or arousal. More confused as to why he was feeling her up than the act itself, she gasped in a broken voice, "W-what…"

_What the hell are you doing?_

Because as much as she enjoyed such a sexy beast being close to her, it beat all bits of logic she'd observed about his character so far.

She didn't know what was going on—this same man had seemed to hate her right off the bat now was breaking into her apartment and groping her as if there was no tomorrow. To any normal person, this would be creepy (and stalkerish and go under several jurisdictions of "sexual harassment" and "lawsuit"), but at this moment, Kagome couldn't really care less as he teased and felt…

However, this really reminded her of this one documentary she saw once on bipolar disorder…

"Your boobs got bigger," he mumbled randomly, his voice sending pleasant chills down her spine and warming her stomach and core. His half-shut eyes now stared at her chest, his thumbs moving over the top curve of her breasts while his palms rubbed across her nipples, sparking jolts that had her holding her breath with bliss.

Kagome, meanwhile, had never ached this much from someone just feeling her up. She didn't know what to do, as embarrassing as it was to admit it, and she could only gasp out silently in a hardly audible whisper, "What?"

Inuyasha leaned forward and pressed his soft lips against her skin, only making her yearn for more, especially when it felt as if every part he touched blazed with passion and restlessness. She felt one of his hands start to trail down from her breast, over her side, his lips still placing small kisses on her neck, and wondered what he'd exactly do next—what other pleasures he had in store for her in the new exploration of lust between strangers/neighbors.

_Why the hell aren't you stopping him? _she asked herself jumpily, but the back of her mind (and a much, much lower region of her body) protested against any attempt to stop him, because honestly: When a smoking hot, chisel-bodied man with luscious hair and intoxicating eyes that you want to ride until you are both spent and sated after hours of passion comes around and practically forces himself upon you, would _you _really want to stop him?

Well, unless you were a man yourself.

Then things just got awkward.

…you know, unless you were gay, then that'd be cool, too…

…

Kagome felt his hand nearly find its way into her nightgown, his skin's flame leaving sweet burns on his hand's trail, but her right mind finally won over—as disappointing as it was—and she pushed him away, causing Inuyasha to stumble back and nearly fall over the box filled with her antique's remains on the kitchen floor. He managed to catch himself on the counter, luckily, and steady his balance while Kagome stood wide-eyed, trying to process all that happened.

_His skin on hers…his hands on her…_

Holy shit.

She just experienced consented molestation—and enjoyed it.

_Holy shit!_

So lost in her thoughts, she almost didn't notice when Inuyasha's eyes lost their glaze and scanned her apartment questioningly before he seemed to realize something, grunted, and left the kitchen.

Eyes now as wide as saucers, Kagome trotted after him, noticing he was making his way back to the door as if nothing had occurred between them at all. Nearly sputtering something unintelligible, she managed to gasp out, "Why the hell did you—_how'd _you even get in here? How'd you get keys to my apartment? Why are you walking out now?"

Begrudgingly, she added in her mind, _And why didn't you let me experience orgasm first…? _

Insert agonized tears here.

Halfway through the door, Inuyasha paused and turned, his amethyst orbs grazing over her form and leaving sparks in their wake. The color was darker than the first time she saw it, whether it be from the lack of lighting her apartment or the sight of her in a nightgown, she didn't know, though she certainly hoped it was for the latter reason he seemed suddenly more seductive than ever—

"None of your fucking business, _wench_."

Oh, _hell _no!

He stepped out the door without another word, and Kagome, red in the face from frustration (both of the emotional and physical kind), went after him, though by the time she reached her door, he had entered his apartment and shut the door none too quietly. Inwardly beating herself up over not being confrontational or at the least assertive, Kagome almost didn't notice how a certain person was slinking against the wall from Inuyasha's apartment to his own, cradling his chest as if a kid was hidden in his shirt.

Almost—but since when did creepers ever really did get _that _lucky?

"Miroku?" she questioned the male with his back towards her, right in front of his door across the hall. Confused as to why he then only acknowledged her by turning his head slightly, she tapped his back with her foot, surprising him and making him jump—

—only to hear many cracking and crumbling noises following.

An awkward, stunned silence followed.

Kagome wasn't sure how long she stood there, staring confusedly at the broken cookies on the floor and glancing at Miroku then Inuyasha's residence, until Miroku whipped open his own door and gathered the remains of his chocolate chip wonders. "See you later," Miroku rushed out before slamming his door shut, only for an outraged cry to sound from Inuyasha's apartment and the sexy deity himself storming outside to break down Miroku's door.

That was the moment Kagome slid back into her dwelling with wide eyes, closed the door softly behind her, and managed to stumble into her bed, disquieted and wide-awake.

If all this came from her first night being here, she didn't even want to know what tomorrow held.

* * *

PP: Never read _Slut Girl_. Nev. ER. DX  
AP: No, read it. You must. :3

**PP'S A/N: **This is the first time AP's and my writing has came together, so if things seemed weird, different, or less humorous from last chapter, that's probably why—we had to combine our writing and shiz. :/ I apologize again, but hey—three more chapters to go! *whoops* Since I'm trying to update all my stories, I don't know when we'll update, but AP is one determined bitch planning to whip me into writing chapters on time, so it'll probably come sooner than this one did. O.o'

AP:** :| *Whip***


	3. Half a Grapefruit

**Disclaimer: **Neither AP or PP is a Japanese woman in her 50s with amazing artistic talent when it comes to drawing manga. PP will stick to her stories, editing, and researching Japan, and AP will stay with her psychology, **photography, and maybe crappy stories on the side**, thanks a ton. :|

**PP'S A/N: **I'm extremely sorry for such a long wait; it would've came two days ago, had I not gotten a bad headache, or yesterday, had I not ran out of my muse—coke—and been unable to write it like I planned. And then AP and I had some trouble writing the citrus as well...so that delayed things even further. xD; However, over three months later, an update has came! I hope I didn't fail and you guys enjoy! ^.^

**AP'S A/N: ^^^ **The bold in the disclaimer is my addition not PP'S =/ Uhm…sorry about the late update. DX Hope you like the sex…? Idk what to say… Guacamole. I don't like it. Anyone like it? Post a review. :P Uhm…enough hold ups. Here's MS chapter 3. :P

**PS FROM PP: **Yeah…this chapter may suck in writing, character personality, and humor. I'M SORRY! *bows in apology repeatedly* **(PS FROM AP: Seriously folks…guacamole.)**

* * *

**Midnight Snack**

a patriot-pup production

_3: Half a Grapefruit _

* * *

When Kagome woke up the next morning, she had the worst case of bed-head known to mankind.

_Dear Kami… _Azure eyes observed herself as she tugged a disfigured strand before letting it go, watching it bounce back and remain as it was. The only thing she could compare herself to at the moment was Medusa on drugs. _What the hell…_ She was a complete wreck—or more like she wrecked on the side of the road and kept on driving and trying to evade oncoming traffic. Or maybe she was hit by a bus mid-slumber, mid-daze?

She knew she didn't get any sleep last night—a certain Adonis would surely haunt her dreams if she did manage to doze off, causing her to hurriedly wake up from sexual frustration and have the urge to get rid of the ache herself—but she didn't think her hair would suffer from it, either. Now, the small bags underneath her eyes—she expected those and could always cover them up with make-up. But her hair…

Gods. She looked like a hooker who just had rough sex—or, in that case, was forced to do "free services."

At that disturbing mental image and horrible comparison, Kagome cringed and headed into the living room, making sure to avoid eye contact with the kitchen where _it _happened. Ruffling through the stuff she'd strewn about the place, she managed to find her cell phone and hit speed dial number one, which, disappointingly enough, wasn't a line to any sex phone services.

She sighed. She really, _really_ needed to get laid—but not right now. Oh, no. She wouldn't let that Inuyasha sex god win her over anytime soon, no sirree. _I swear it's like my life is just some story for other people's amusement, where the writers are sadists…_

"Kagome?" Sango's voice came from the other end, calling her back from her thoughts, and a _pop_ was heard on the other end. Undoubtedly her friend's back—or some trainee's—Kagome shivered at the noise before putting on a fake smile, forgetting completely that her friend couldn't see it. "What are you doing, calling me at work?"

Shoot—she forgot Sango worked today (unlike her, who got the next week off to move in). "Oh, my bad," Kagome laughed nervously, hesitantly sitting down on her party couch. Who knows—she could be up and moving the next second due to the ghost of the woman who once lived here randomly appearing and seeking revenge for her killer. After all, the poor woman was killed in a car accident—head-on collision—and Kagome thought it'd be awesome to tell ghost stories of hearing car alarms and honks around midnight just to make her brother wet himself. "I was just wondering if, uh, you wanted to go pick up some paint and other stuff with me to fix up and decorate my apartment." _And help me escape this freaking apartment building ay-sap!_

She didn't exactly add she needed to escape because she'd be creaming a permanent stain into her pants if she stayed near the Adonis reincarnate any longer, though. The poor trainer wasn't even aware Kagome _had _a sex drive—how the hell was she supposed to explain to outgoing, experienced, yet oblivious Sango that the sexiest man ever born fondled her breasts the previous night when walked away like nothing happened?

_Exactly._

"Sure," Sango quickly replied, and a _thud _was heard, undoubtedly being the client she was helping. Kagome briefly prayed for the poor soul who was just dropped unexpectedly to the floor before Sango added, "Just let me take a shower and get changed, and I'll be right over." Kagome opened her mouth to give her consent, but before she could do so—

The dial tone rung in her ears.

Well, _damn_. Wasn't Sango eager to get over here today? Huffing, she ignored the bad taste her friend's uncharacteristic impoliteness left in her mouth—and her mind, of course, wandered to what other tastes could be in there instead. Resisting the urge to smash her head against the wall from her constant perverted thoughts as of recent, Kagome crossed her arms and checked the time, estimating when Sango would arrive. Approximately at eleven, maybe, if she was lucky and Sango didn't nearly run into everybody on the way; the woman was known for her road rage, after all. (She remembered one specific incident where the yoga trainer felt a good fit of rage towards an old woman with a cane crossing the road when the light was red, raving on and on to the book lover about how long she was taking to cross while the quieter of the two tried to calm her impatience. Ever since, when she was in the car with her best friend, Kagome brought headphones to drown her out.) And if that was the case, she'd have enough time for a shower herself, wouldn't she?

Never the one to have been coordinated, she practically tripped over her apartment's bare floor in her hurry to get to the bathroom. She was careful with removing her clothing (an act that felt oddly more sensuous than usual), and when in the shower, made sure to ignore touching her body too much in fear she'd be thrust into visions of hard muscle, sensitive, soft flesh, and feral violet eyes tracing her form, meeting her eyes mischievously… Her core growing warm and moist from feeling his glossy, stimulating, raven locks… Strong, calloused hands over her precious mounds, teasing and twisting and touching—

Wait, what?

"_Gah!"_ She slapped the shower nozzle and quickly shook out her hair, hoping no suds were left. She'd never been in a hurry to get dressed in her life, always loving her baths dearly, but _damn_—with a rude sex god like him entering all her thoughts, she couldn't risk getting turned on again. Nearly slipping on her way out of the bathtub-shower combination, she dressed in the simple green t-shirt and white shorts she had picked out beforehand, trying to control her erratic breathing in the meantime.

She had to admit, as amazing as last night had been—a sex god like that coming into her apartment and molesting her with consent was not one of her fantasies, though it might as well have been—she did not want a replay. She was not easy! She was Higurashi Kagome, librarian and heroine to children everywhere! She encouraged reading, keeping your trap shut, and being studious, not climaxing from the mere sight of a practical stranger!

She nodded her head firmly, puffing air and sticking out her chest at this internal declaration. That's right—she wouldn't fall under anyone's charm so easily, and if that sex god/molester wanted to pay her another visit in his sleep tonight, she'd be prepared.

Now, all she had to find was a cat and office chair…

After laughing evilly and soon battling with the monster that was her hair—"Damn you! Become _straight_ again!"—Kagome rubbed her aching head while walking through her new living room. She was so relieved Sango agreed to meet her for some girl time; the further away she found herself from this apartment, the better chances she'd forget about sex overall. Nodding to herself, sure that time with Sango would be one of the biggest turn-offs in history, and not paying any mind to the noises out in the hall, Kagome opened her door—

Her jaw hit the floor for the trillionth time since she arrived at her new apartment.

Sango was getting it on with Miroku.

In the hallway, where anyone could see them.

_OH MY GODS._

"_WHY? _WHY?" was all she could force out, and a breathless, red-faced Sango acknowledged her briefly with a nod of her head before just about sucking off Miroku's mouth as if her friend's presence hadn't really settled in her conscience. And even though they weren't to the actual sex yet and were mostly clothed, Kagome felt her empty stomach churn. She knew Miroku and Sango had been intimate in college, but…dammit. She didn't want to see _this_! They were slamming into each other, eating the other up, trying to tear off their own clothes…! _This _was like free porn for a sex addict!

Trembling from the scarring sight of it all—Miroku's hand cupping Sango's bottom, Sango grinding into his covered front as he rammed her into the wall—Kagome squeaked, covering her eyes and accidentally ramming into a wall in a lame attempt of an escape. "W-what about Kuranosuke?" she managed to get out, Sango mumbling a _cancelled all future dates with him five minutes ago_ in response, as if it were truly that simple. Making disgusted noises and practically scratching at her eyes as she turned away from the heated, temporarily reunited couple, she almost didn't notice when a certain apartment door whipped open to reveal an annoyed, walking wet dream.

_Almost_—but then she spotted him, just two feet away, and he watched the scene between Miroku and Sango with disinterest. "Really?" he said blankly, though the heated couple paid no mind to their audience. "You really have to fuck right here, right now, out in the _hallway_?"

_Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit—_

The familiar heat gathered in her stomach, the moisture increasing in-between her legs as her eyes roamed over the firm, shapely limbs, his glistening, tanned torso that seemed to have been carved specially by the gods, the onyx strands either tied in a ponytail resting on one broad shoulder or sticking to his masculine face, the one she instantly imagined in-between her legs, working its succulent, rosy petals on her lower lips. Embarrassed—or pleasant—heat automatically began flooding her cheeks, and maybe she was radiating warmth or something, because the feral, amethyst gaze hidden by dark, seducing bangs flashed to her form, criticizing her with tough, untamed eyes.

Her jaw about fell off.

It was official: she needed to get out of here _NOW_!

Scanning the hall for some sort of escape from this, she kept fumbling against the wall, finding her eyes stuck to his form against her own will until she found a knob, twisted it (ramming into the door a few times within a matter of seconds, being in too big of a hurry to get out of there), opened the door, and flung herself into a safe haven—

—only to meet the questioning eyes of a knitting Kaede.

Internally cursing herself for at least not checking where she was going and wondering once more what the Kami had against her, she awkwardly forced out with a grin, "Hey, um…hi."

Kaede stared blankly in return, seemingly uninterested in her presence. "I do not wish to know why ye entered my apartment without so much of a knock," she said sternly, and Kagome averted her eyes as though the scene from outside would be replaying in her blue orbs. "However, if ye help me with my plants, I will allow ye to stay."

The intruder visibly deflated with relief. "Alright, Kaede-san," she agreed, scooting away from the door and following the old woman teetering to her kitchen. Sapphire eyes scanned the room warily, taking in the ranch interior designing and homey feel of the place, and her nose twitched as she caught the faint scent of cookies in the oven. Nearly jumping out of the open window from frustration upon remembering Miroku's two cookie thefts and when Sex Bomb Inuyasha stole the entire pot—with her there, nonetheless!—she screamed in her head, _What's with these people and cookies?_

"Here," Kaede said, catching Kagome off-guard when _she _was the one to throw something heavy into the other's arms this time. The new resident looked down in her arms, observing the green watering can with doubt before turning back to the elder female who was making her way across the room already. Her arms still sore from yesterday—her furniture and full pot of cookies could snap anyone's spine in one day—she unsteadily followed, stopping eagerly when the woman pointed to a small pot of petunias. "Water that, please," Kaede requested before moving to a window with a rose bush hanging off the ledge.

Not paying attention to the amount of water she let into the pot—her mind was in a dirtier, lust-filled place where a certain looker was naked and awaiting her arrival—Kagome tipped the can and didn't notice as the water drenched the flowers and flattened them to the ground. She moved onto the rose bushes, doing the same, though when Kaede barked out another demand, her psyche was ruined and the pot was sent flying off the ledge and onto the sidewalk seven stories below.

…Whoops.

Pretending nothing happened and hoping Kaede didn't see the nervous sweat beading on her neck, she went to where the old woman was and made sure to water the lilies more gently this time. Kaede, probably deciding her work was good enough, went to make herself comfortable on the couch and began speaking as Kagome fiddled with the strange petals of the lily.

"I apologize for Inuyasha's behavior yesterday; he's not exactly the friendliest boy around."

"Oh!" Kagome gasped, not expecting her to begin talking about _him_. Her being startled caused her hand, which was grasping onto a lily petal, to jerk, ripping off the poor petal as if it were nothing. Silently squeaking to herself, she tried to put it back on the flower without Kaede noticing.

"To be frank, ye look an awful lot like the woman who owned the apartment previous to ye," she continued, oblivious to Kagome's internal panic. "Seeing ye probably gave him a shock."

"I—I see," Kagome managed to say casually, still stabbing the flower with the petal in hopes it'd become whole again.

Kaede turned to look at the girl, and Kagome quickly covered the plant from the woman's good eye's vision. "Tell me, child, how did ye sleep on your first night here?"

"Horrible," Kagome confessed in a groan, avoiding Kaede's gaze as last night's events played through her mind for what seemed like the millionth time. "That guy—Inuyasha—he sleepwalked right into my apartment; had a key and everything!" Mumbling under her breath, she added without giving a clear explanation, "He kept me from getting my midnight snack or going back to sleep."

Kaede nodded in understanding, turning away from Kagome once more and letting the poor woman attempt to "fix" the plant to the best of her ability. "As far as I knew, he was friends with Kikyou, as was I; she told me he sleepwalked into her apartment nightly—it just happened to be his place to go—and she got so used to it, she gave him a key so he could just come in for himself and she could continue sleeping on. So, that would explain the key and why he came to your apartment: force of habit." Kagome nodded, even though the woman couldn't see her, and faintly heard Kaede chuckle to herself. "Heavens, I'm sure everyone in the building knows about that boy's odd sleeping habits. Once, I remember Kikyou and I woke up to Inuyasha nearly falling down the stairs."

"Oh my god!" Kagome gasped, her surprise causing her to rip off another petal. Holding in a frustrated scream, she forced out, "Did he?"

"No," Kaede responded, "we shoved him."

And at that, Kagome lost her balance and crushed the entire lily.

"I remember how he broke an arm on his way down and how we had to call an ambulance to come and take care of him," Kaede sighed, oblivious to the younger female's shock as she looked at the ceiling as if it held a memento of the time. "Good times, good times…"

Deciding the flower was beyond help now that even gravity defied its existence, Kagome slowly connected the pieces together in her mind. Inuyasha had a habit of sleepwalking—and he was friends with Kikyou, who gave him an apartment key and coincidentally looked like Kagome herself. And then Inuyasha sleepwalked into the dwelling he was used to visiting and felt up her chest, probably comparing it to the dead Kikyou's. It broke her heart—and sex drive's hopes for what could've been a one-night stand—to say it, but finally, she could see the truth for what it was:

Inuyasha was a necrophiliac.

Thoughts halting to a sudden, staggered stop—and not even bothering to say goodbye to Kaede—Kagome raced out of her apartment at the new discovery, only hearing what seemed to be the old woman mumbling to herself that she'd have to bribe Inuyasha into fetching her new flowers again before she locked herself in her apartment.

Time to initiate Operation: Confrontation…

**^—^—^—^—^**

It was just after midnight when the door clicked—just as she anticipated. She had everything set up; she'd gone out and bought not only the food she promised herself to get the previous evening, but also a new chair. Even her dialogue was planned out, and Kagome had to say, Operation: Confrontation was sure to be a complete success. Who cares that she could still hear Miroku and Sango going at it in his apartment across the hall and Kaede's complaining about all the noise next door as she watched reruns of some old people's show? This plan was _foolproof_—she'd confront his butt right here, right now, and she'd tell him that _she knew_.

_She knew _his lusty desires for a dead woman. Hohoho, oh, how _she knew_…!

The moment he entered her apartment, the door echoing softly with a _click _behind him, she swiftly turned towards him in her swivel chair, petted her family's cat Buyo (whom she'd kidnapped a few hours earlier), and greeted him in her best mysterious business voice. "Hello there, Inuyasha; I've been expecting you."

And despite her total straight face as she said it, he walked past her as if she said nothing, ignoring her as his sleepy form somehow led him through the living room obstacles and into the kitchen once more. Pursing her lips in annoyance, Kagome tossed Buyo across the room—eh, cats landed on their feet anyway—and pursued the gorgeous man who just technically broke into her apartment…again.

Since all her neighbors seemed to be awake at this hour, she didn't even bother controlling her volume. "Hey!" she yelled, approaching the toned, tanned body on its way to her fridge. "Who do you think you are, walking into people's homes like you own a key?"

Rewind—he did own a key. Crap.

"I mean, you necrophiliac!" she shouted, correcting herself. However, he remained ignorant of her in favor of opening her fridge and feeling the contents inside, searching for something. Irritated beyond belief by just how _rude _he was being in his sleep right now, she marched right up to him, tapping his shoulder as she looked at what he was exactly doing. "How dare you come into my apartment, raid my fridge, and—" She paused and wondered—should she scold him for feeling her up when she gave slight consent and enjoyed it?

Wait—was he reaching for her oden?

The world seemed to stop turning—just for a moment—before an infuriated battle cry roared through the air.

_NOOOOO! _That was _her_ midnight snack, dammit!

Grabbing his sturdy shoulders with strength she never knew she possessed and overlooking the electric sparks and instant warmth from her hands on his smooth skin, she pulled him away from the refrigerator, back towards her, where he then proceeded to tumble into her and send both of them to the floor.

How Operation: Confrontation became such a failure, she'd never know.

His head smacked into hers, his body crushing her to the ground, and _everything_ of hers ached from fall—from her back to her chest, from her head to her tailbone, _everything_. Groaning somewhat, she was surprised when he seemed to pick himself up, though she was exceedingly glad for the lack of weight on her. For a few moments, his eyes remained closed, his body in mid-air with only his toes and hands to support him—hands that happened to be pinning her to the floor, mind you. As the pain faded away, she wondered what in the hells he was doing; his body was slowly lifting into the air…then growing closer to her…before just lifting again. What was he—

Wait—he was doing push-ups in his sleep?

Kagome's jaw broke off.

Her shocked eyes wandered over the taut, flexing muscles of his chest, abdomen, even down to the perfect lines that formed a _V_ rising from the hem of his boxers. He was doing this after all…wasn't he? Yes, yes, he_ was _doing push-ups mid-slumber! Holy—

At this point, her jaw should've just flat-out disintegrated.

No matter how random his push-ups were, no matter how…_incredible _his body looked and felt against her, it still didn't change the fact that she still had an operation to try and save. And _by Kami_, was she going to save that op—

Her heart jumped and fell awkwardly as he came down close to her for a short second—closer than he had before. She bit her lip as her senses intensified and her pulse began racing from his overall proximity. Not to mention, the looseness of his boxers had allowed for a certain appendage of his to touch her thigh…

_It's not fair…, _Kagome thought, internally crying from the torture, _it's just not fair! _There could have been no way she could be so lucky and so cursed at the same time, could there? Especially his "appendage" being so close to her aching womanhood…

If Kami existed, they were emotional sadists.

Through her thin lips, she let out a small, almost pained gasp, glancing up at his "sleeping" face that showed no signs of awareness of his…part's location. Honestly, how could he sleep, do push-ups, and _still_ make her throb with want?

Another close push-up…

This time, the tips of his rich, onyx hair touched her collarbone, sending a pleasant chill down her body and straight to her core. Kagome huffed; that was the drawing point. _Screw the operation!_ He had to get off of her—_immediately_. But why…oh, _why_ did she have to make this decision?

Managing to find the will to move from her current position, Kagome attempted to get her arms free from the grip of his strong hands. "Inuyasha, maybe you shou—" she began, only to let out a squeak.

He had stopped the push-ups and released her only to place one hand over her breast. He tugged at the fabric of her shirt, as if trying to get it out of the way and reach the prize of her chest, and Kagome's eyes widened even further, leaving her looking like a deer in headlights. She felt herself grow wetter for what she could have sworn was the trillionth time since moving in, and cursed herself for not having any self-control over her arousal these days. At this rate, she'd be out of fresh panties before her first week!

She noticed a growing impatience in him when his hands became more frantic, and before she could react to his sudden change in mood, he had released her other arm, ripping open her _expensive_, silk, button-down shirt.

Remembering how that cost her three paychecks, her rare temper immediately sparked. "How dare you—" She was cut off again as his hands were now both on her breasts, gently cupping them and sending soft, hot sensations through her body at his touch. He stayed kneeling over her, still in a way that kept her pinned down to the wood flooring, and how he managed to be dominant while he slept eluded her. When he squeezed both mounds, Kagome automatically arched her back up further, feeling nearly overwhelmed from being fondled for a _second time_ by a real-life sex god.

It almost escaped her currently distracted conscious, but she faintly noted how one of his hands moved underneath her, blindly searching for something.

Her eyes locked onto his muscles as they moved with every slight shift of his body, and wondered how so easily they all seemed to intertwine and cooperate with his movements; they _pronounced_ what he was doing, made it all clearer and more forceful. The feel of his fingers on her back sent more shivers through her body, and she ached for more…but she shouldn't. No. She couldn't just let this orgasm-inducing, beautiful, feral-looking, violet-eyed, chisel-bodied sex god with suck-able lips and, now that she thought about, a member good enough to make her cream upon first sight…

Wait, where was she going with this?

With the sudden interruption in thought, she finally realized what he was doing: he was looking for her bra clasp!

Thankfully for her mind and unfortunately for her libido, all common sense she had came back to her, making her slight irritation at him for potentially ruining a fabulous shirt—no matter how _unearthly sexy_ it was that he ripped it open like he owned her, sending the buttons flying to the floor—come back almost immediately. And at that, how could she forget the important detail that he was a _NECORPHILIAC_?

Without a second thought, her hand cocked back and she smacked him straight on, across his cheek, her teeth gritted and her palm only slightly stinging from the move.

However, the contact caused him to pause.

Her jaw dropped (yet again), surprised that she had actually slapped him. Coming to the conclusion that it _had _to be guaranteed she wouldn't be getting laid by him now, she whimpered from the lost possibility. Sure, she didn't want to sleep with him—right away. But she was sort of hoping…maybe later on, when she got used to the building…she could maybe sleep with him. You know, just for one night, or even better yet, every night for the rest of her lif— _WAIT! _Hold the phone! He… He was…

…waking up…

_Oh, shit._ His lids slowly began to open, slowly revealing perfect, mauve eyes that locked onto her sapphire ones, the emotions behind them almost indecipherable. "Ah…" was all that came from her mouth in a small croak, a forced, nervous grin spreading on her lips. Her hand was still in the air from the assault she had just given to his face, and she knew he must have felt a sting on his cheek when his amethyst eyes glanced to her hand and an irritated expression came over his features.

And slowly but surely, she felt his hands slide out from around her.

_Shit…no. _There was no way he was going to escape this time, not when she had him so close in her grasp. No matter how stalker-sounding her thought seemed, she wasn't going to let him just leave as he had before _just _when she'd created a plan to confront him on this whole "invade the newbie's apartment" drama.

"_No!" _she roared and grabbed his shoulders, swiftly pushing him down onto the floor in one movement. Damn. Maybe she was secretly strong, and the thing that brought it out was an Adonis-like being in her presence. Though how often would that happen? She was surprised at herself for her show of strength, but there was one thing that hadn't clicked in her mind yet—

"What the hell are you doing?" her intruder asked in an annoyed voice.

Her thoughts about her own actions exactly.

"Um…well…" _Act casual, act casual, act casual_— "You were about to eat my oden."

Wait, what?

He raised one bushy eyebrow, the movement making her nerves tingle for some reason. "I was about to eat your…oden?" he finished, his tone suggesting her IQ was quite lower than her career would suggest.

Which, you know, it wasn't. Huffing (and gathering what little balls she had), Kagome proclaimed, realizing her plans could play out _perfectly_ now, "Why, yes; you've invaded my apartment twice now, and key or no key, I don't appreciate the intrusion, buddy."

For an odd reason she didn't know, he didn't fight her holding him down as he lifted his eyebrow even further up. "Oh, really?" he said, tone just as sarcastic as when she first met him. "Because if you had an issue with me coming into your apartment, couldn't you change your lock? Maybe blocked my door from the outside or even your door from the inside with a chair, probably that damned swivel one over there?"

"HEY! That's _my _swivel chair!" she snapped back, not appreciating the verbal treatment her new favorite piece of furniture was receiving from the Adonis— Well, actually, any chair acknowledged by him is a lucky one. Huh.

"Well?" he continued, ignoring her comment and reeling her back to Earth. "Why didn't you? Or did you spend all your time coming up with a stupid plan, like replaying an old scene from _The Godfather _with a cat and that specific swivel chair?"

…dammit.

"I did not," she insisted, forcing an unconvincing scowl to overcome her face. Seeing he wasn't believing her one bit, she snapped, "What are you, invading my home, feeling me up—"

"Feeling you up?" he asked, eyeing her topless chest for another time, this time actually figuring out why she was flustered. "Keh. I thought you were offering yourself up to me or something." She about choked, but he didn't pay any mind to her as he kept on talking casually. "This _does_ explain why I was dreaming of boobs constantly, though."

Her head exploded.

After gathering up the pieces of her blown mind, she stared at him in disbelief. The jackass "trapped" beneath her—albeit a drool-worthy jackass, but still!—had the gall to be rude, steal her cookies, break into her home, make her have wet night dreams and daydreams, feel her up like it was _nobody's _business—though it was clearly theirs—INSULT HER SWIVEL CHAIR, and now accuse her of offering herself up to him?

Though she had to admit, giving any part of her to him wasn't anywhere _close _to a bad idea…

Whoa-ho. No. What? She puffed out air at that idea, in disbelief it would ever happen. She was not some whore—

Her rushed thoughts halted as she came to notice something very peculiar and the world stopped revolving.

…Were his hands really moving along her sides?

She glanced down, wide-eyed and in shock, staring at what she couldn't believe to be true. Was he _really_ awake? Or was he now just screwing with her? No…if he were screwing with her, she'd be the happiest person alive. So what the hell was he doing? Was he some sort of tease, rapist, child molester—

Oh, wait; she remembered now: he was necrophiliac.

Pff, how could she forget?

She would've tapped her temple at the realization had his large, slightly calloused palms not continued their way up, grasping her breasts and making her gasp all over again at the electric sensation. A smirk moved across his lips as if he knew he held control over her—which he sort of did at this point, but _still_! She was an independent woman, dammit, and wouldn't allow herself to be some stranger's latest sex victim. Hoho, no, she wouldn't be that girl!

As he continued moving his hands on her chest, the arrogance in his self-assured grin made her want to smack him all over again. He was lucky it felt too damn good for her to move, or else she'd be slapping him to the lowest level of hell and back!

…Aw, hell, who was she kidding? _She_ was the one who was hitting the jackpot in this situation; she really shouldn't complain unless she wanted to be tortured by the Kami further. As his touch seemed to deepen its effects into her skin, her lips parted involuntarily, and she let out a soft moan, hardly noticing when he moved around, undoing her bra successfully this time.

It was a quick fluid motion, making her wonder somewhere in the back of her mind exactly how skilled he was when it came to that, and the moment it was over, she found one of her eyes twitching from the sudden intrusion of privacy.

Her mind snapped back to reality when she found herself lying back on the floor underneath the godlike being, now towering over her and making her question whether she really wanted to remain an independent woman or not. He leaned himself down towards her, letting his hair brush over the bare skin of her torso, and she almost came right then and there.

_Kami, WHY…?_

Amazed that even his _hair_ was causing her to ache with utter want and need, she let out another moan only to receive an amused chuckle in response. Furrowing her brows, she managed to snap in a somewhat irritated voice, "What's so funny, bud—"

His tongue flicked over her chest, tracing along up to her neck, cutting off her sentence and making her eyes go wide as her body froze in utter delight and wonder. His sharp canine nicked her skin lightly, though still enough to make her gasp, pondering over how every little thing he did seemed to make her wetter, beg for release, for _more _and _more_. And she could tell by the confident look on his face, how every move never once decreased her excitement, that it was as if he knew exactly what she wanted, what she _needed_, what she desired and required all along.

His tongue worked wonders on her flesh, and the librarian already felt inexperienced compared to him—and he just got started! He was doing so much more than she was, and yet, by the looks of it, wasn't exactly asking for anything back yet. But the question lingering in her mind now was how far was he going to take it…and how much further was she really going to let him go?

He picked up his head and stared at her with his passionate, aubergine-colored irises. "Tell me, Kagome, have you been dreaming about me?" he asked in a deep, smooth, sultry voice, teasing her while his fingers trailed along the curve of her body, skimming invisibly drawn lines that made her shiver with physical joy before dipping down into her shorts that matched her silk top.

Faintly noting he remembered her name, she didn't even have enough time to lie since her breath hitched in her throat blissfully, her shoulders rolling up in satisfaction as she bit on her lip harshly.

_Holy gods, holy gods, holy gods, HOLY _FUCKING_ GODS!_

His fingers tantalizing ran up along the outside of her panties, feeling the arousal that had nearly soaked its way through and making her stomach tighten in a good way. "I think we both know the answer," he huffed almost inaudibly, pride still sugarcoating his captivating voice as his lips moved back down against her neck, his warm breath tickling her skin and near contact making her hum with anticipation.

Eyes closed tight, Kagome tried to keep her pulse under control—it would for sure ruin what was happening if she were to have a heart attack—all to no avail. She could _hear_ the smirk in his voice that revealed he knew just how much he was affecting her, turning her insides to near Jell-O and rendering almost all her muscles useless. He knew just what he was doing to her, the jerk, and he was obviously not going to stop anytime soon—not that she exactly wanted him to. In fact, she could have easily stayed like this for the rest of her natural-born—

Her thoughts broke into small pieces until they turned into dust all over again when his fingers slowly pulled her panties aside, allowing his long digits to touch against her slick core and the air to hit everything that was warm and moist down there.

She knew his eyes were locked on her expression even as her eyes remained closed, almost glued shut. A shaky breath left her lips at the feeling he was giving her of just about everything, and her hips rocked upwards for a short second, hoping to create more contact between them. However, following her movements was a jolt of electricity that coursed through her body the moment his free hand gripped her hip and held her body down.

He was going to take control, and she wasn't giving any complaints.

Kagome took in a sharp gasp, feeling his fingers slip inside of her tight, inexperienced passage, and completely foreign to the feeling, she found herself cooing at the light sensation it gave her stomach. Her hands hesitantly moved over his chest, sinking into his thick, luscious hair, and she found herself grow even more turned on with how amazing it felt to run her fingers through his onyx strands. "_Oh_…" she panted out, feeling his fingers sink deeper inside of her in the same, short breath.

Her eyes opened again, just in time to watch his deliciously wet, apparently faultless tongue, one that she hoped would be just as skillful as his fingers, flick over his lips in hunger.

His mischievous smile then returned full-force as he leaned himself down to her again, continuing to work two of his digits in and out of her body tortuously slow, still turning her breathing pattern irregular and making her heart beat quicken. It pained her even more that she couldn't rock her hips into them since he was still holding them in place, but she could what she was given and moaned at his demonstrations.

"How does it feel?" he asked in a low, suggestive voice, running the very tip of his tongue along the line that defined her lower lip.

Now, _that_ was definitely unfair.

She tried her best to shoot him a deadly look for that almost-kiss, but only succeeded in releasing more whimpers of pleasure.

He chuckled again, kissing down her neck and leaving trails of blaze as he went, her chest rising and falling unevenly as she unsuccessfully tried to maintain her breaths. He had nearly kissed her, and instead, the bastard only ran his perfect tongue over her lips—teasing her, the action being enough for her to smell the sweet scent of what was possibly peppermint on his breath, and to bring her so close to his face that she could practically see her reflection in his pearly white teeth.

Everything about this damned, very sexy man was perfect. It just wasn't fair.

His lips touched her stomach lightly, grazing along her heated flesh gently, as if trying to skim water without getting too wet. And that was when she realized where he was headed…

Her heart practically exploded through her sternum. _So much for keeping my pulse under control…_

She felt her shorts and her panties being slid off of her hips and then her legs before she could even blink; her chest swelled with anxiety at the motion, wondering if this was really the moment he'd do it—when _it _would happen. Was she really about to have Adonis himself go down on her? This was all a trick. It had to be. A sick, sick, sick, twisted, sadistic, unfair trick—

His tongue was then against the inside of her thigh, lapping at her skin and making her gasp and shiver with surprise and lust beyond comparison. She tightened her hands in his hair, almost begging for him to go on with what he was doing, and she moaned lowly only to receive yet another damn chuckle from him in response.

"Come now, Kagome…have patience." He grinned against her thigh, his fingers caressing along more unseen lines, setting her flesh on a sort of fervent, restless, and yet soothing fire.

She almost groaned at his words, whether it be from agony, need, or anger, she would probably never know. If only she could "cum". And patience? Hadn't she had enough patience with him already? How dare he tell her to have—

She gasped loudly, sure that even Shippou and his poor family downstairs had heard her as her breathing turned erratic, her gaze suddenly hazy and fogged. Through another self-pleased smirk, his tongue moved along the outer edges of her core, slipping between her lips and pressing lightly against her clit.

Although she was overridden with newfound covetousness and bliss, Kagome didn't know what to do; she had never had anything like this done to her before… Actually, come to think of it, she had never had _this_ done to her before. Her old boyfriend had never even offered to—

Another thought interrupted, though her mind was scattered about her apartment by now, when she felt his tongue dip down to her entrance, slipping inside very slightly before coming back up. He sucked against her sensitive bud more, causing her to writhe in pleasure against the wood flooring, wondering how such small actions could create such warmth in her core. _Screw the other thoughts,_ she decided, tossing her head back once his tongue clicked over her clit again. This would be all she would ever need.

She knew she should tell him to stop, that he wasn't allowed to invade her space, touch her, and satisfy her. She just knew she should…but who in their right mind ever would? With this god of a man lapping at her core, letting out a low moan every now and again, stroking her legs and sending an uncharted amount of pleasure through her body… See her point?

Kagome could have swore that she even _felt_ a tingle of the peppermint that lingered on his breath, and it only added to the overload of inhuman stimulation he was providing her with, making her feel what seemed like everything and yet nothing but him_ down there_ at the same time. She managed to catch her breath when his lips moved away, kissing along the inside of her thigh once more whereas his fingers retook their place inside of her, thrusting in and out and stealing her ability to breathe all over again.

Her vision blurred for a short second when the tips of his magical digits brushed against a place inside of her that made her nearly orgasm right then and there. She was sure with a few more thrusts of his fingers, she'd be on cloud nine… No, screw cloud nine—she'd be on cloud _sixty-nine._

A faint sound of a chime rang throughout her apartment, the number of strikes declaring it was officially one in the morning. No doubt they came from Kaede's grandfather clock next door she spotted earlier that afternoon.

Unfortunately for her, Inuyasha's head popped up at the sound of the rings, and a devilish smirk crossed over his succulent lips. His fingers stopped their motions and carefully left her body before he kissed his way back up her torso.

She was beyond confused, and her hips wanted to buck against his grasp like before. Was he about to give her what she secretly wanted, after all? Was it really going to happen?

"Don't finish without me. We'll continue this tomorrow," he commanded, running his lips over her jaw swiftly before easily standing up and beginning to walk away.

No…

_No…_

_NO!_

"No" was the only word that seemed to come to mind whereas he'd simply just stood up as if nothing ever happened and smirked at her again, the shine from her juices still on his lips and now probably on her jaw. And then, just as quickly as he seemed to always come in, he slipped out of her apartment with enough grace to make nearby dust bunnies cry.

She didn't even bother going after him; she wasted most of her effort just putting back on her clothes. Her legs felt numb, her body senseless, as if not reaching orgasm meant nothing else was worth feeling in the long run. Glancing back at the fridge that held her oden—and glancing at the stomach whose hunger no longer haunted her—she sighed before going to check her appearance in the bathroom. And the moment she looked in the mirror—

Dear Kami. It was a replay of this morning all over again.

How in the _world_ did her hair get like this when she barely did anything? _How?_

Grumbling under her breath about stupid, teasing sex gods leaving their poor victims a hot mess, she combed through her hair as much as she could and straightened out her clothes in case she put them on wrong. Inspecting her appearance and nodding to herself again, she managed to walk towards the front door. She may've been too weak earlier, but _ohhhh_, boy, when she got to his apartment, she was going to give Inuyasha a piece of her—

"I HATE HIM!" Sango announced loudly, stomping into the apartment without much of a warning. Kagome mentally apologized to their somehow sleeping neighbors who survived the noise prior to her friend's arrival before turning to her flushed friend with mussed hair and no breath. "He's manipulative, flirty, conniving, perverted, everything I've ever wanted, and I HATE HIM."

"…Sango," Kagome chided in a normal voice to the woman raging past her already, looking over the girl's appearance with slight worry. "You're…naked." Well, technically naked and covered with Miroku's bed sheets, but what was the difference really? It was to be expected out of someone who just had sex, but…shouldn't Sango have at least grabbed her clothes?

"HATE HIM," the yoga trainer repeated, trudging into Kagome's bedroom and ignoring her friend's acknowledgement by slamming the door behind her.

And just as Kagome was about to speak again, a certain monastery dropout rushed past her, whining "San_goooo_! I didn't mean it!" and knocking on her bedroom door while only clad in briefs. Sango began shouting things back, Miroku insisting she got it all wrong, and Kagome was left in a mess all over again, standing idle in her doorway, wondering what to exactly do:

Sleep on the couch tonight and listen to the arguing, apparently reunited, nude couple while remembering what happened in the kitchen right by the living room, or sneak into Miroku's unlocked apartment that's filled with who knows what?

She'd rather not even think about it.

* * *

**PP'S A/N: **I'd totally understand if we got no reviews to this chapter concerning my writing, considering the citrus was the only good part, but we'd still appreciate feedback…even if you're bashing me. .' .,

**AP'S A/N:** I don't know if the citrus was that good. Though apparently "it's my specialty." Anywho folks…**G-U-A-C-A-M-O-L-E.**


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